Owning Your Own Carpet Shampooer

We all hit that stage in our life when we decide to settle down, perhaps get married, have a few kids, buy a house and become the adult our parents begged us to be.

How hard could it be? After all, you watched your parents pull it off making it look pretty simple.

You have found your perfect bride, the one just for you.

You can see your future with her as the picture perfect life.

Nice big house, 1 son and 1 daughter, great career and a nice big home to show for all your hard work.

The big day arrives and everything goes as perfect as you and your wife could dream, thanks to your parents that worked so hard to give you the perfect day. You couldn’t be happier.

Skipping Seven Years Later

Your dreams have partially come true; you do have two children, twin toddlers and girls. You have a beautiful home, just not as large as you had planned. That’s fine; you really don’t like mowing the yard anyway. The yard is covered in toys and the Great Dane your wife insisted on having has no problem leaving large gifts everywhere that only you know how to pick up. Yeah, life is rosy.

College Pays Off

Both you and wife have successful careers. She is a successful lawyer and you work in the engineering department at a local factory making parts for automobiles. At least that department in your life is great. Well, it was until your boss came in and told you they were doing layoffs and your position was being cut. You no longer have a job.

After the shock wears off you begin to like the idea of staying home for a while. After all, the twins nanny always seems to be so anxious to leave the minute you get home; it would do you and the kids good to spend quality time together.

Stay Home Dad

Your first night of not having to get up by the alarm clock, “ah, this is going to be great” you think as you lay awake that night watching the sports network until 3am. Suddenly, there is a horrible sound as though an alien has made its way into your bedroom to projectile its foreign guck everywhere.

You jump to see what it is startled to find its no alien at all, it’s your daughter. Your very sick daughter that has tossed up everything she has eaten in the last 24 hours, all over your carpet. You have no idea what to do.

You gag your way through cleaning up the mess, but that smell, that horrible smell is possibly going to be the death of you. So, you do what any dad would do, you call your mother.

You cry to your mother explaining the situation, she asks if you have a carpet cleaner? Beings you do not know, you text your wife. You hang up and wonder why you didn’t think of that?

Your wife tells you no, you do not own one. You asked if she rents them or should you go buy one? She replies she is too busy working because ONE of you has to bring income into the household, to just make a grown-up decision. You fall back down in your man chair.

The Pros and Cons

After you stop crying you decide to get a piece of paper to do a list of the pros and cons of renting vs. buying a carpet cleaner. In the meantime, the twins have added more to your job by spilling juice on the carpet in the living room. One went outside and brought back in with her shoes, a gift from Goliath, the Great Dane. Your list looked kind of like this.


  • Convenience: When accidents happen, you have the cleaner ready and available to clean right when it happens instead of after the stain sets in. There are some stains that once they dry, are almost impossible to be removed.
  • Schedule: Moms (and Dad’s) usually have a million other obligations going on at one time. Owning your on carpet cleaner gives you the freedom to do rooms one, or even at a time.
  • There are various types and sizes of carpet cleaners. Buying one gives you the freedom of picking one that is just the right size for your needs.
  • Being able to clean stains as often as they need cleaning is another perk to owning your own machine.
  • The freedom to using the chemical of your choice is a nice perk.
  • Once your carpet cleaner is inside, there is no loading and unloading of a big, bulky machine.


  • Not knowing who the last person that used the machine used it for. Not knowing what is in the machine just sounds yucky!
  • Did the last renter clean the head of the machine before returning it?
  • There could be grease, grim, paint, or chemicals still in the carpet cleaner that could destroy your carpet.
  • Not knowing how long it has been since the carpet cleaner has had any maintenance work performed on it to know if it works or how long it will work after getting it home.
  • The cost of the machine, along with the chemicals can be very expensive. Plus, you have the drive to and from the store to make for pickup and delivery.
  • Most of these rental carpet cleaners are big and bulky. This makes them hard to operate around the home.

After looking at your list, it’s clear what the smartest decision would be. You get out of your man chair, grab the kids up, pick the food out of their hair and get the cheerios out of their ears, load them in the truck and off you go.

The entire way to the super center you hum the theme to the Rocky movie, gloating in the thought of your wife’s face when she gets homes and see’s the amazing job you have done. You can imagine the praise she will give you.

You chuckle to yourself wondering why you were so scared about this. How hard could this be? After all, it’s just a simple carpet cleaner, what is the big deal? In the store you go with the twins in the shopping cart as you whistle happily. There it is, the vacuum cleaner isle, you are almost too excited about this.

You make that turn right and there they are, all of them…All 50 of them…You suddenly want your man chair again.

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